The Crazy Really is Leaking Out…

Posted: July 12, 2008 in Uncategorized

A long time ago, when I was but a wee lad, I did a bad
thing:  I lost my temper and hurt
someone.  The kids in the neighborhood
were out making a snow fort with a 5 gallon bucket.  If memory serves, this thing was gonna be totally
sweet.  I don’t really remember what set
it off, but I got mad and started kicking down part of the wall.  I was probably only mad at 1 person, but now
everyone was mad at me.  Someone said
something, and what little reason an adolescent has went out the window:  I ran and jumped on the person as hard as I
could (I was not really a fighter in those days).  Then I got up and ran inside. 

As it turns out, this person’s attempt to ward me off in mid
flight had hyper-extended the thumb.  The
person went to the doctor, and etcetera. 
My mom and stepdad were none too pleased with me, I’ll tell you
what.  Being the sorts who handed down
liberal amounts of whuppin’, they showed me the
error of my ways.

I stopped losing my temper mighty quick.  Usually I just roll over like a dead
fish.  Every bit of anger, of rage, of dissatisfaction
gets pushed down and locked away.  I keep
it all in a vault at the bottom of a hole now. 
The thing is, this box is starting to crack.  Yesterday, I was stuck in traffic and my
radiator kept boiling over.  I ran late
for a meeting.  When I got close to the
area that I needed to pick up some equipment, I couldn’t raise anyone on the
phone (they knew I was gonna call, but they didn’t have the phone where they
could hear it).  I went to dinner, but
didn’t get anything for a variety of reasons that I won’t get in to here.  By the time I got where I was going, my mind
was so poisoned with red thoughts that I couldn’t speak. 

I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure I can’t go on this
way.  Bottling things up like this is
gonna kill me, or worse, someone else.

  1. Roberta says:

    You can always call and talk to me… right now Corinne is even in Colorado so you wouldn’t have any interuptions… I am always here for ya!

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