Lead Feet

Posted: September 25, 2008 in Uncategorized
I started to feel lonely a few days ago.  It wasn’t a rational feeling; I have excellent friends and they generally anchor me in the realm of the sane.  Even so, my heart took on some of the less pleasant aspects of lead.  I felt as though moving was more effort than it could ever be worth.  My musculature worked fine, but I was crippled all the same.  I don’t really know what brought this on.  I have some ideas, but nothing concrete yet.  I need to figure it out though.  The Slowness (which is how I’m referring to it) has claws sunk deep into me.  I had a hard time telling until earlier today that there really was a problem.  I had a great time at fighter practice last night, and so I thought I had just been in a funk.  When I woke up this morning, I felt as though I was riveted to my crappy futon.  Of all the places to be stuck…

I’ve got to break free of this.  Every aspect of my life is being harmed by my paralysis.  Hopefully right now the damage isn’t irreparable but I’m certain that I can’t go on like this. 

When the hell did I get so angsty?

Earlier I posted some lie about how I’m ok now, but I took it down.  I’m not ok.

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Comments
  1. Deandra says:

    Lesson #1: pay attention to your bodyLesson #2: let your friends help when they notice something’s wrong.  that’s exactly what friends are for.

  2. Roberta says:

    You need to come lay on the beach with me… that fixes everything!

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